Me? Who am I? Where am I from? You don’t need to know that.
Who are you? Standing there on the other side of the abyss, looking in?
Ask yourself (seriously, go, do that).
You figure that out and I’ll be doing the same over here on this side.
Small talk, not for me, no thank you.
“Hi, how are you??”
“Good, fine! (Lie) What about you?”
“Great! (also lie) Well, ok, see you later! (probably a lie as well)”.
The fuck is that?
What did that uncover, how did that form a deep and meaningful connection?
I want this blog to be the antithesis to our culture’s obsession with the shallow, with repression, and the denial that comes from fear of emotions deemed socially uncomfortable. I want,
“Hey, how are you?”
“Well, actually, I’ve been dealing with some pretty intense anxiety and the occasional suicidal fantasy”.
Is that ok to say? Yes, yes it fucking is.
I’m here to take myself to the edge of my own comfort zone and then keep right on going. And if you’re reading this, then I’m dragging you with me. Look, I’m not saying it’s not scary. It is. I’m often paralyzed with fear. All I’m saying is that it’s not going to stop me. Let’s normalize and destigmatize honesty, demystify staring down that abyss of the self. And in doing so, we’ll make it less existential-terror-inducing. For, if we can go bravely forth into that darkness, then we can make some real progress. I think. I hope.
And remember, the point of treading fearlessly into that darkness is to illuminate the shadows, to find that little glowing ball of light within. It’s there, I promise. Keep looking. And when you find it, hold onto it and keep going.
Ok, ok, that’s enough.